Hello world, it's been too long.

Well not actually, I'm not quite sure how long too long has been until I realize it...does that make sense?
Anyways I'm listening to all these old songs that have gobs of memories stuck to them, and it's making me feel like I actually have stories to tell, hah.
I'll explain them to you. Notice the recurring pattern.

Fuzzy Blue Lights by Owl City- My vacation to palm springs, where I knew I lost my best friend. We were fine for the most part, but then I guess my subconscious knew about a year before my head, I started puking at the pain I felt but I couldn't explain it. I know now.

The Heart of The Matter by India Arie- I just really like this song, it makes it easier to get through the day:)

Luv by Travis- The song I listened to when my brain actually realized I lost my best friend. And no, she didn't die, we just can't be friends anymore. How unimportant is that? well anyways I've cried to this song, and I never cry.

Slide Show by Travis- About life going on and on, How everything is beautiful but you just want to cry. I really like it. (not as an excuse for being so dramatic!)

The Boy Who Blocked His Own Shot by Brand New- How I kept on feeling over and over and over all year that me a whatsthatgirls trying to reconstruct broken shards with chewing gum.

When The Day Met The Night by Panic At The Disco- life before the world came crashing down, oh what a wonderful world.

Memory[acoustic]>>or not< by Sugarcult- What I listened to when I got over a boy, haha now there's nobody ever ever ever to get over because there's no one there in the first place.

Play Crack The Sky by Brand New- It's beautiful in a weird dysfunctional way, good to listen to when you feel like muck.

Thats The Mistake We Made, Having Never Ever Planned To Fall In Love,
~n-ething but me please

hey, lets bulid it all back together.

I know I posted a post, but shakira changed my mind:]
I think what's missing is my smile, my real actual laughs, and maybe even liking myself again.
I know things are easier said then done, but maybe if I say it then I can do it!
I'm going to make my broken MP3 player the greatest broken music machine the world has ever seen!
I will smile more often and permit myself to be myself, which might not be too loud- or too quiet. I'm going to make it through the whole two weeks left of school, and I am not going to quit. This is a test that will make me stronger and better,
this is the way I think it will all work out:DDD I'm sure of it!
I'll love me if it kills me,
N<3
Listening To: Gypsy- Shakira

The only exception of hypocrisy, is coincendence.

Hello world, I've got a lot to say without any time on my hands.
What a shame.
I would really like to reinvent myself into something wonderful and new,
just like I used to be. hah,
This will just be quick, and like I said before I will make this thing beautiful once I have fully emptied myself, I just don't know how long that will take.
I want to branch out, but I have no fertilizer. That's just a big fat excuse now isn't it?
I've been listening to the same song on repeat for a half an hour now, I wonder when my ears will permit something else into them.
I'm really better than you think I am, than I think I am.
I just don't know how to get all that out of me, I will practice I will practice!
There is one known fact though,
The greatest place to hide a diary- the internet.
watch that slap me in the faceeee.

listening to: paramore- the only exception